Jeremy’s Log, Here!

October 30, 2009

The Ten-Minute Blogger

Filed under: Blogging, Business, Copywriting — Jeremy @ 3:14 pm
Tags: , ,

A couple of years ago, in my post “How do I Find Time to Write Every Day“, I was bemoaning the fact that I was finding it difficult to find the time to write something for my blog. I still have that problem but at least I know that there are ways of dealing with it. Another difficulty I sometimes have is knowing what to write about. That issue is easily solved. I only have to look at my mission statement on my “About Jeremy” page to remind myself of what this blog is all about.

But the main issue I still have is finding the time to put into practice what I have learnt about creating and maintaining a successful blog. However, I have just recently read an article in Writing Magazine which explains that you can develop a writing habit by spending just ten minutes a day – every day – creating something for your blog, novel, short story, magazine article or poetry collection. It can take up to 21 days to form any new habit, so for the first few days the routine will be quite difficult to maintain, but it is important to keep plugging away.

It might be helpful to set targets. For example, I have found Darren Rowse’s 31 Days to Build a Better Blog extremely useful in this respect, because Darren sets you daily tasks to be completed. However, if you’ve only got ten minutes a day to spare, you can take 31 weeks or 31 months to complete the course. The important thing is that you must spend at least ten minutes every day in order to create your new writing habit. It is probably best if your ten minutes are at the same time each day – perhaps first thing in the morning or last thing at night. I shall be finding my ten minutes during my lunch break.

My goodness! Is it that time already?

October 20, 2009

It’s Time for a Revamp!

I started this blog just over two years ago so I think it’s about time I started making a few changes to it. It won’t be a complete redecoration, but more of a spring clean (or should that be an “autumn tidy-up”?).

I have already made a few tweaks – for a start I’ve inserted a link to my photo gallery on Flickr – and the blogroll will undergo some tidying up fairly shortly. But the major change is that this blog will now focus solely on the business of writing, editing and proofreading, with a few funnies thrown in to keep you amused.

To deal with my spiritual life as a member of the Bahá’í Faith I have created another blog – The Tiverton Bahá’í. However, this website is still under development and over the next few months I will be spending some time providing content that is worth reading and worth your while revisiting the site for. But in the meantime you might like to visit some of the other Bahá’í blogs and websites that I have created links to in The Tiverton Bahá’í blogroll.

June 14, 2009

Negotiating a Price: The Vendor–Client Relationship

Filed under: Business, Funnies — Jeremy @ 3:15 pm
Tags: , , , ,

The relationship between a vendor and client can sometimes be quite fraught, especially when negotiating a price for a job. Watch the following video. Has this ever happened to you?

June 2, 2009

It Takes Guts!

Filed under: Funnies, Proofreading, Words and language — Jeremy @ 11:07 pm

The following item was posted by Paul Crabb on SfEPLine, the e-mail discussion group of the Society for Editors and Proofreaders.

“A recent Freecycle announcement:

‘Does anyone have a small fridge in working order. This is to fit under a
worktop. My friend runs a local village bowels club and they need a fridge.’

I bet they do, especially in this heat!”

How to Use an Office Chair

Filed under: Funnies, Words and language — Jeremy @ 10:35 pm
Tags: , ,

Christine Lindop, who is a fellow member of the Society for Editors and Proofreaders, recently bought a new office chair and was somewhat bemused by the instructions that came with it. The User’s Manual had some wonderful pronouncements such as:

“Headrest height: It is the most suitable height that the scruff is fully supported by the headrest.”

“Arm-pad angle adjustment: It’s the available method to lighten the harm to the hand, that one puts the elbow on the armrest naturally according to the working need, and avoid working without elbow support.”

And best of all:

“Seat depth adjustment: It’s the best depth when the haunch is full on the seat, the waist is crutched completely and the inturn of the knee can not touch the seat brim.”

As Christine commented: “And to think all these years I’ve been sitting with a partly crutched waist…”

May 10, 2009

How to Spot Symptoms of Swine Flu

Filed under: Funnies, Words and language — Jeremy @ 9:52 am
Tags: , , , ,

My friend Briar Singleton has recently shared with me the following symptoms of Swine Flu:

Look out for any unusual blemishes or rashers.
Unusual behaviour: Doing things you would normally find a complete boar.
Bad temper: Things start to easily rind you up.
High temperature: Feeling that you are absolutely bacon hot.
Chills: Feeling like you need to hog the duvet or curl up in front of a crackling fire.
Developing a sty in either or both eyes.
Urgent cravings: For a large glass of swine or stuffing yourself on apples.
Wanting to fight: Shouting things like “Gammon, have a go if you think you’re hard enough”.
Having trouble with the truth: You’re always telling porky pies.

If any of these symptoms show, then immediately call a hambulance, and go to the hogspital for treatment. Smokers please note it is a non-smoking facility, so you won’t be able to have a snout. If it’s a false alarm, you can trotter off home, but if the symptoms return, you may need to go to your local farmacy for some oinkment.

Another treatment for Swine Flu: Spend the night in a smoky room and in the morning you will be cured.

FIFA has banned Mexican Waves at soccer matches to prevent the spread of infection.

With all the information we are receiving about Swine Flu from the media and the government, there is no danger of us being pig-ignorant about it!

May 6, 2009

Can Windows Error Messages Be This Poetic?

Filed under: Poetry, Words and language — Jeremy @ 7:24 pm
Tags: , , ,

In Japan, the impersonal and unhelpful error messages from Microsoft have been replaced by traditional haiku poetry:

The web site you seek
cannot be located, but
countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Windows XP crashed.
I am the blue screen of death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful
but now it is gone.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.

Three things are certain.
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
but we never will.

Having been erased,
the document you’re seeking
must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

May 5, 2009

The Backup Song

Filed under: Funnies, Music, Poetry — Jeremy @ 8:50 pm
Tags: ,

A few months ago, in a blog post titled “To Buy or Not to Buy” my friend Vanessa Cobb bewailed the fact that her computer had been playing up so much that she had been forced to think about getting a new one. She did so through the eyes of Hamlet. If she had left it too late, and the hard drive had failed before she had backed up her files, she might have thought of this song.

Yesterday,
All those backups seemed a waste of pay.
Now my database has gone away.
Oh I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly,
There’s not half the files there used to be,
And there’s a millstone hanging over me
The system crashed so suddenly.

I pushed something wrong
What it was I could not say.

Now all my data’s gone
and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay.

Yesterday,
The need for back-ups seemed so far away.
I knew my data was all here to stay,
Now I believe in yesterday.

May 4, 2009

Some Song Titles to Make You Laugh

Filed under: Funnies, Music, Words and language — Jeremy @ 8:18 pm
Tags: ,

My previous post was about my nephew’s rock band. They don’t play Country and Western music, so I’m sure they wouldn’t touch any of these classics, which are listed on the Freeman Institute website:

  • I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim Is Gettin’ Better
  • I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well
  • Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In The Bed
  • Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth ‘Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye
  • Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure
  • How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away?
  • I Don’t Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling
  • I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me
  • I Flushed You From The Toilet Of My Heart
  • I Keep Forgettin’ I Forgot About You
  • I Wouldn’t Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win
  • I’m Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life
  • If You Don’t Leave Me Alone, I’ll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will
  • If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?
  • Mama Get The Hammer (There’s A Fly On Papa’s Head)
  • My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him
  • She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft
  • She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

April 26, 2009

I’ve “Always Never” Followed Rock Bands – Until Now!

Filed under: Entertainment, Music — Jeremy @ 11:21 am
Tags: ,

I’ve never been much of a fan of rock music – I prefer the music of the 1940s big bands to that of present-day rock bands. However, I’ve started to realize that my nephew Matt Lockyer has become a seriously good musician – he is even taking a music course  at college. His band “Always Never” regularly plays gigs locally here in Tiverton and attracts quite a following. A recent press report in the Mid Devon Gazette described Always Never as “Four hoodies with more chops than the meat counter at Morrison’s” who play “a seriously good set of grungy metally stuff that manages to be aggressive and progressive at the same time”.

But don’t just take my word for it! Visit Always Never’s MySpace page and sample their music for yourself. You’ll be pleasantly surprised – I certainly was!

Next Page »

Blog at WordPress.com.